Thief Stashes Stolen Gems In His Rear End

A diamond mine worker was caught stealing when he walked past a security scanner with over a hundred sparkling gems stashed up his rear end.

A spokesperson for the Miba mining company, Mike Mutombo, said the thief, a cleaner, "hid the small stones in his anus". The stones were valued at over $5,000.

"An investigation has been opened and the heads of the relevant services have been suspended", he said, adding that it was "practically impossible" for the heist to have been organised without the help of insiders.

The spokesperson didn't get into the details of how the diamonds were recovered, which is probably for the better.

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